Today my heart is aching for humanity. I see a world that is so divided. On days like today I feel powerless to help. I wish I could show everyone that at our core, our essence is the same. I wish people could see that the differences we observe in each other are as superficial as the clothes in which we dress ourselves. Just as each wave in the ocean is unique, so are we, but we are still all part of the same body of water. We are still all part of the same ocean.
I’m starting to understand that everything I am is simply an identity I wear – a façade. Even if I could live my truth fully, that would be a façade of sorts. I wasn’t born Adam; this is just an identity I have created over the last 33 years. At my conception, I was nothing other than a spec of pure awareness. My identity has been crafted over the years - parts of it given without my permission (what others think of me) and the other parts accepted through choice (what I think of myself).
I can’t profess to know where we all come from, or what the meaning of life is, but I do feel strongly that the essence I speak of is from the same place and is connected in some way. I think that’s how we come to feel the pain of others, and how a smile from a stranger can warm your heart. How else can this be explained?
Days like today, I feel like a stranger in my own world. It feels like I don’t fit in. The western and capitalist norms don’t feel like they make sense to me anymore. And yet, I am a product of both and find myself continually tricked by them.
The rise of a political landscape that seeks to divide and create “them and us” breaks my heart. If we are all connected by our essence, then this division will only take us further away from ourselves. It only serves to fragment our ownsouls. In my opinion, whatever is being played out in ‘reality’ is just a metaphor for what is happening within each individual – conflict, hurt, loss.
This same culture has taught us that our worthiness is defined by what we own, and not by who we are. It seems that working hard for more, bigger and better has promised to replace the feeling of fulfillment that can only really be felt by helping someone else in need. At least that is my experience. For an intelligent species, I’m left flummoxed as to why we haven’t yet figured out that ‘things’ and ‘status’ don’t forge a path to contentment. And yet, our economy is built exclusively upon this premise. Without people believing it to be true, western economies would fold.
But there is still hope. That little word that has done so much, for so many, for centuries. Hope that we are ‘waking up’ to all this. The western world is said to be in the grips of a “mental health crisis” with depression and anxiety leading the way. But what if these weren’t mental health conditions that required medical intervention? What if they were innate states of being that can show us more fulfilling ways of living, if only we could step off the treadmill and find the time to sit quietly and listen to their teachings? Instead, our culture has decriminalised alcohol to numb us from our pain and caffeine to keep us running from what I think we all know to be true.
As I write, I fear judgement from my peers. Indeed, I question who on earth I think I am to be espousing these sweeping statements and speaking in this way. But I am equal to all, so my opinion is valid. The world relies on us all finding our truth and having the courage to live it, speak it and share it. Our waves must be seen.
I care so much. I have a capacity to love that feels deep and profound. I hold on to hope, and will do my very best to step out of this identity I find myself trapped in to play my part in building a more peaceful and fulfilling world. In fact, it doesn’t feel like a choice anymore; it feels like my inbuilt human responsibility.